Having to wear glasses has always been something that’s given me the shits. When contacts became available I started wearing them occasionally, but their shortcomings were evident: having to be very careful not to lose them while going for a swim, and getting dry eyes regularly, especially when spending long hours in front of a computer like I do. The goal had always been to get laser eye surgery and fix the problem once and for all, but when I first looked into it it was still a relatively new procedure, still improving all the time, but not something I was entirely comfortable entrusting my sight to.

I forgot all about it for a long time, but, as I’ve got more active over the last few years, the shortcomings of contacts have become more evident and I resolved to look into laser surgery again. I have a couple of friends who have had the procedure done and been delighted with the results, even after a decade and a bit of research showed that the technology involved has matured significantly and there’s enough of a body of previous patients out there that any long term issues resulting from the procedure would have started to show up.

Since it’s elective surgery, I’d have to wait a few years to have it covered under my health insurance, so I resolved to pay for it myself. As it happened, Perfect Vision, the guys who brought the procedure to Australia, had a two-years interest free offer on, so I decided to take advantage of that and rang them up to start the process. The first stage is a complimentary assessment, where they examine your eyes, testing the thickness of your corneas and other details, in order to determine both your suitability for laser correction and which of the three types of correction is most suitable for you. Thankfully my eyes were in good shape and were suitable for the quickest and easiest procedure.

Stage Two was a meeting with Dr. Con Moshegov, the surgeon who’d be doing my procedure at which he double-checked my earlier assessment, fine-tuned the exact amount of correction I would require and answered all the questions I had surrounding risk factors, side effects and the likelihood of something going wrong. He assured me that the risks were minimal as long as I followed their post-op instructions and the fact that Perfect Vision include a life-time guarantee on their procedures seemed to confirm this. If I end up under or over-corrected, they’ll fix it for free, if I became short-sighted again at a later date, they’ll fix it for free, and if my distance vision goes at a later date, they’ll fix that for free too. The only time they won’t fix my vision in the future was if I needed reading glasses due to the natural ageing process, or if my vision deteriorated due to an eye disease (cataract, glaucoma, etc.) unrelated to my surgery.

So, that done, I was all set for the surgery, which was scheduled for Friday morning. I was told to ensure that someone would be there to bring me home and that I brought sunglasses with me as my eyes would be quite sensitive to light afterwards. I arrived at the surgery and spent some time filling in some paperwork and signing consent forms, then had to wait around for about an hour as other patients got their eyes done before it was my turn. I’d previously been given some Valium and Panadol, both to calm nerves and relax facial musculature, so the final prep saw me outfitted with a hair net, some anaesthetic drops in my eyes and the surrounds swabbed with betadine. It was also at this stage that I took off my glasses for the final time, never to be required again!

After a couple of minutes wait, I was ushered in to the surgery, made to lay down on the table and was shuffled around until my eyes were correctly aligned with the machines. My eyelashes were taped back and a device was inserted to ensure I couldn’t blink, though as my eyes has been anaesthetised, this wasn’t uncomfortable. Stage one was to cut a flap in each eye, which was done by a machine first placing a suction cup on my eyeball to hold it in place, then making the incision. This took about 10 seconds per eye. The surgeon then lifted the flap out of the way, at which point by already blurry vision got even worse. The laser was swung into place and I was instructed to look into the flashing orange light and to remain still. At this stage all I could see was the orange light, surrounded by a ring of white LEDs.

Then the operation started, accompanied by a series of clicks as the laser fired, and the smell of burning hair. I had assumed this was my eyeball being burnt into shape, but technically it’s not. The laser causes a chemical reaction to take place which is not burning, though it sure smells like it. A unique experience nonetheless! At the same time I could see the ring of white light being refined and alternately being sharpened and blurred as the laser did its thing, and then it was all over. Twenty to twenty five seconds - just like that. The surgeon then replaced the flap and as he did so everything came into sharp focus and I realised I could see again. Amazing! The process was repeated with the other eye, then I got up and walked out of the surgery unaided!

After a quick check to make sure I was feeling OK, wasn’t feeling unsteady from the Valium and understood my post-op instructions, I was free to go. Jacqui collected me and we jumped in a cab home. I had to keep my eyes closed the whole time as they were super-sensitive to light, but once indoors again I could open them and see properly. Post-op was fairly straightforward: take the provided sleeping pills, go straight to bed and aim to sleep for four to five hours. Most important was to keep my eyes closed and relax. I woke up a few hours later, took the supplied painkillers although I felt fine, and then just dozed for the rest of the day, keeping my eyes closed as much as possible. I could see perfectly as this stage, and was able to get up and sync some podcasts to my iPhone so I could listen to them in bed.

I woke up the next morning with perfect vision (pardon the pun). Could see clearly, no pain, no problems. A post-op checkup had been arranged for early Saturday morning, and it’s recommended that someone accompany you to this, but I was fine so I put on my sunnies and got the bus into town. A quick eye test confirmed that I had 20/20 in one eye and slightly better than that in the other, then the surfaces of my eyes were checked to ensure the flap had resettled correctly and I was on my way.

I have a regimen of antibiotic and anti-inflammatory drops to follow for the next two weeks and my eyes are prone to dryness and I see slight haloes around lights at night. Both of those are known side-effects which typically wear off over a couple of weeks.

For those of you considering getting it done, do it. The surgery itself is easier and less uncomfortable than a trip to the dentist (and I don’t have a fear of dentists), and the post-op was about as uncomfortable as waking up the morning after a big night out going and realising that you left your contacts in, though obviously there’s no guarantee that that’s exactly how it will be for you.